Yes the topic is straight forward and any EPL fan or better, the ones who have seen the EPL advertisement would understand it
Note: I tried for wordplay in the title but “gunnerfied” sounds to Harry potter-ish
I’m an tamil-Brahmin or better known as tambrahms. And my relatives no matter how distant( in terms of relation ) they are, are obligated to have a meaningful conversation with me. I dont know if there is some kinda of tambrahm rule book or sketching, but this meaningful conversation will have no boundaries, i.e., it can be about academics( and we don’t talk anything below the IIT level) or movies (rarely) and the frequent sports Convo to show that they are youthful in their heart.
Similarly, an uncle of mine ( my dad’s-mother’s-father’s-brother’s-daughter’s-sister’s-son) had come the other day. Yes, he is an IIT graduate. And I hadn’t known he had come. Had I known I wouldn’t have come anywhere close. But sadly I hadn’t known and so as I entered my own house, I saw him sitting on the couch sipping his filter coffee which he couldn’t refuse when offered. Seeing him made me so alienated in my own house. And the moment I dreaded happened, he called me and made me sit next to him. I felt like a student caught by the principal for chewing gum.
So he tries to be cool and strikes up a conversation after Thr regular “do you remember me?” monologue.
He asked “what is your favorite sport?”. If I had answered cricket, then the conversation would’ve ended right there after a few sweeping statements about Sachin’s 100th century. But no, I decide to play favoritism there and say “football” which I shouldn’t have.
The obvious response “oh! Manchester untied is your favorite team ah?” he asked munching on some grand sweets mixture.
My second mistake, I should’ve said yes and ended the Convo with some comments about how great Manu is from the person who is never watched a manu game ever in his life.
I agree, I’m too proud to be a gooner and I don’t give up that easily. So I reply to him ” not manu, arsenal”
His immediate reaction was as if I had asked his daughter for marriage and he says “arsenal ah? They keep losing no”. I think he was referring to the 4-0 Milan defeat and somehow magically forgets the next 5 victories. Even before I could respond, he comes up with an other statement ” my son is a manu fan” and the son he is talking about is a definite IIT candidate in the Near future who doesn’t know that Portsmouth got relegated and he might have spoken about Manu somewhere sometime in some context.
No matter who, where and whenever ( and by whenever I mean, even if arsenal does a double ) normal people who don’t know shit about football and the crazy football addicts, the ones who know the different years in which manu have won, won’t leave you without making your life miserable for being an arsenal fan. And whenever you have to face such a situation, just tell them “why do we need batman when we have robin” and walk away. You will look so stupid and dumb than the Chelsea fans, that they won’t have anything to reply and the argument ends there. This is how you deal with jerks
High in weed